How many Vilani does it take to change a light bulb?
I'm not sure; I better look it up.


How many Solomani does it take to change a light bulb?
Fewer than anybody ELSE, damn it!


How many Zhodani does it take--
- - --To change a light bulb? I knew you were going to ask that.

How many Hivers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They get someone else to do it. And what's worse, they make them think
it was their idea all along.

(or)

How many Hivers does it take to change a lightbulb?
<hold up both hands and slowly wiggle fingers>

How many K'Kree does it take to change a lighbulb?
As many as can fit into the room.

How many Aslan does it take to change a lightbulb?
Male or female?

(or)

How many Aslan does it take to change a lightbulb--GLURK!
<grab; throat squeezed slowly> I do not know, little human, but I wish to laugh
as hard as everyone else apparently is. Why don't you tell me?

How many Vargr does it take to change a lightbulb?
Four. One to go get a ladder, one to slug the first one and take the ladder 
away, one to slap the second one around and force him to hold the ladder while
the first one wipes his bloody nose and climbs the ladder, and one to stand
by and smirk until the job's done and then take credit for it.

(or)

How many Vargr does it take to change a lightbulb?
YES! <insane half-barked, half-howled laughter>

How many Droyne does it take to change a lightbulb?
Six. It ALWAYS takes six. EVERYTHING always takes six.

(or) 

HOw many Droyne does it take to change a lightbulb?
Six. A Worker to split a claw trying to hit nails in the dark, a Warrior
to rough him up for damaging valuable nails with his carelessness, a Drone
to cast the coyns and decide if maybe darkness isn't a good idea, a Leader
to trip over the hammer and scream for something to be done at once, a
Technician to immediately implement a feasibility study for future illumination
patterns, and a Sport to watch the proceedings with resignation, sigh, and 
go get a lightbulb and put it in himself.

(or)

How many Droyne does it take to change a lightbulb?
<look around fearfully, then hesitantly peep in a tiny voice:> .....One?
